The world calls me a medical student but I am ashamed of it. Medical students are supposed 2 b studious and hardworking. Then who am I? Some feel I m a nincompoop build on the bucks drained on me by my ever toiling parents. Some feel that sheer luck has played my trick. But believe me, I didn't want it. I never asked Him to be born as the only son to a very academic engineer with an influential social status and then rot my life under the pressure of responsibility. Responsibility of behavior, character, merit n so many other things.
Is studies, career, social status everything in life? Are we born just to fulfill our parents' and our society's expectations? Isn't there anything that would help us realize the absolute independence of the individual? I don't know. Even in today's very liberal world I am into medicine only because it's a responsible line and will catapult me into a secure future. Or more importantly, it is because my parents wanted it. And society? Well, society just rubbished me off even few years back, insulted whatever merit I might have possessed. Now that I am into medicine, I have, all of a sudden, become the cynosure of all and sundry. A laughing stock! Comparisons are always being drawn between me and dad. Did I ask for them? My dad was academic, fine, how does that imply that I should be academic as well. As far as MBBS is concerned, I m proud of that I could be a part of it. The students here are really talented and it's truly a glamorous line but somewhere, down the line, I feel maybe I don't fit it here.
So what did I actually want from life? Well, I don't really know. There were so many options, u know, some practical, some abstract. I wanted to enjoy my singular life time; I stand by "enjoy". I wanted to fly away into the clouds, the deep blue sky and make the moon my very own or dive into the depths of the ocean and play with the corals and just sail away or get carried away by the wind far, far away into the paradise of my dreams where there would be no cruelty, hatred, selfishness or competition. I don't want this fight for survival; whether I win or lose I just want to banish it.
But then the more I think of it I realize that who am I to do it? I am nobody. Neither can I effectively change anything n make it my way. Even after all the glam and appreciation, the slightest of soul-searching will expose that I am just yet another human soul fighting for the basic needs to sustain my existence on the planet.
Is studies, career, social status everything in life? Are we born just to fulfill our parents' and our society's expectations? Isn't there anything that would help us realize the absolute independence of the individual? I don't know. Even in today's very liberal world I am into medicine only because it's a responsible line and will catapult me into a secure future. Or more importantly, it is because my parents wanted it. And society? Well, society just rubbished me off even few years back, insulted whatever merit I might have possessed. Now that I am into medicine, I have, all of a sudden, become the cynosure of all and sundry. A laughing stock! Comparisons are always being drawn between me and dad. Did I ask for them? My dad was academic, fine, how does that imply that I should be academic as well. As far as MBBS is concerned, I m proud of that I could be a part of it. The students here are really talented and it's truly a glamorous line but somewhere, down the line, I feel maybe I don't fit it here.
So what did I actually want from life? Well, I don't really know. There were so many options, u know, some practical, some abstract. I wanted to enjoy my singular life time; I stand by "enjoy". I wanted to fly away into the clouds, the deep blue sky and make the moon my very own or dive into the depths of the ocean and play with the corals and just sail away or get carried away by the wind far, far away into the paradise of my dreams where there would be no cruelty, hatred, selfishness or competition. I don't want this fight for survival; whether I win or lose I just want to banish it.
But then the more I think of it I realize that who am I to do it? I am nobody. Neither can I effectively change anything n make it my way. Even after all the glam and appreciation, the slightest of soul-searching will expose that I am just yet another human soul fighting for the basic needs to sustain my existence on the planet.
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